Sunday 14 February 2010

B*$%^& B@~:?:

I just heard on The Andrew Marr Show that among the proposals for new laws suggested by their viewers one of the most interesting was that supermarkets be forced to shelve all their goods in alphabetical order. You can see the inspiration behind this. You walk into a supermarket you don't know, and where on earth do you start to shop? You have to go through every aisle - they quite possibly WANT you to go through every aisle - before you find what you're looking for. With the alphabetical system, however, you could dash along to the initial letter of your desired good, and, bingo, the shopping is done and dusted.

'Would you need any other letter than B though?' asked one of the guests on the AM show, and when everyone looked puzzled, he added, 'Beer and bread.' I must say I liked this idea. I know Lent is almost upon us but I couldn't resist playing with the letter 'B' to see exactly what necessities (what I define as necessities), I could come up with under that letter alone. At times, I have been a little bit loose in applying the 'B' rule, but this is my blog, and frankly, what are you going to do about it anyway?

The list is, I think, more than sufficient, to keep a man alive and vaguely happy.


Bacon
Back gammon
Baked Alaska
Balsamic vinegar
Basil
Basmati rice
Beans
Beef
Beer
Benedictine
Blue cheese
Borlotti beans
Bovril
Brandy
Bratwurst
Bread
Brie
Broccoli
Brownies
Brown sauce
Brussels (Sprouts)
Burgundy
Butter

Errr, that'll do. Takers for other letters?

1 comment:

  1. Sorry haven't got time at present for other letters, but what about 'bloater paste'- we've actually got some in our larder! Nearly forgot- beet-root, great in sandwiches! By the way does your 'about me' contain any clues as to the identity of the 'mystery man'- anagrams perhaps, or rather more subtle and sensible clues, such as the 'Beacon House' enigma? Yours, Sherlock.

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